Quadrivial Pursuit: How Well Do You Know Reed?

1. What is Reed's official-unofficial motto?

Capitalism, Patriotism, Free Speech

Communism, Atheism, Free Love

Criticism, Astigmatism, Free Tuition

Paganism, Humanism, Free Tibet

Hedonism, Dadaism, Free Beer

OK, even Lewis & Clarkies should know this one.

Explanation

OK, even Lewis & Clarkies should know this one.

2. What is the official mascot of Reed College?

The Learned Owl

The Always-Industrious Beaver

The Griffin, because Reed sports victories also don't actually exist

The Red-Crested Grind

The Fruit Bat of Futility

From Under the Green Tiles, by Beatrice Olson ’24: “The griffin has from time immemorial symbolized a guardian and protector of man and the beasts of the earth. In its early habitat in Asiatic Scythia, it was credited with the protection of gold and precious stones. Thus, in familiar tradition, it has gained, through centuries, the attributes of swiftness and strength in the service of protection.”

Explanation

From Under the Green Tiles, by Beatrice Olson ’24: “The griffin has from time immemorial symbolized a guardian and protector of man and the beasts of the earth. In its early habitat in Asiatic Scythia, it was credited with the protection of gold and precious stones. Thus, in familiar tradition, it has gained, through centuries, the attributes of swiftness and strength in the service of protection.”

3. What key intellectual cornerstone for the Reed community was laid in 1919?

The term “paradigm” was coined.

The Honor Principle was enshrined in the Reed constitution.

Letter grades were abolished.

The first MLA Handbook was published.

"Sleep-deprived weeping” became an Olympic sport.

In 1919, the key intellectual cornerstone for the Reed community was laid when the Honor Principle was enshrined in the Reed constitution. This signifies the importance of integrity and ethical behavior in the academic and social life of the community. The Honor Principle sets the standard for honesty and trust among students, faculty, and staff, creating a culture of mutual respect and responsibility. It is a fundamental value that shapes the Reed community and guides its members in their pursuit of knowledge and personal growth.

Explanation

In 1919, the key intellectual cornerstone for the Reed community was laid when the Honor Principle was enshrined in the Reed constitution. This signifies the importance of integrity and ethical behavior in the academic and social life of the community. The Honor Principle sets the standard for honesty and trust among students, faculty, and staff, creating a culture of mutual respect and responsibility. It is a fundamental value that shapes the Reed community and guides its members in their pursuit of knowledge and personal growth.

4. What major internet-related achievement is credited to Larry Sanger '91?

Made original “I can has cheezburger” meme

Founded Zombo.com

Only living person who has never been rickrolled

Coauthored Norton Utilities software

Cofounded Wikipedia

Sanger was editor-in-chief of Nupedia, the precursor to Wikipedia, and first came up with the idea of using wiki technology to build an "open" encyclopedia that anyone could write. Deconstructing Wikipedia from the June 2010 edition of Reed for the fulll story.

Explanation

Sanger was editor-in-chief of Nupedia, the precursor to Wikipedia, and first came up with the idea of using wiki technology to build an "open" encyclopedia that anyone could write. Deconstructing Wikipedia from the June 2010 edition of Reed for the fulll story.

5. What did Reed professor Stanley Moore do in 1954?

Made the now-famous observation that computer processing power doubles every 24 months

Refused to answer questions from the House Un-American Activities Committee.

Soared to a commanding two-and-a-half-length victory in the Belmont Stakes

At the peak of anti-Communist hysteria, Prof. Moore was fired by the board for trustees--despite having tenure--for refusing to disclose his personal political beliefs. Read about the whole sorry chapter in a 1997 article in Reed titled In the Eye of the Storm.

Explanation

At the peak of anti-Communist hysteria, Prof. Moore was fired by the board for trustees--despite having tenure--for refusing to disclose his personal political beliefs. Read about the whole sorry chapter in a 1997 article in Reed titled In the Eye of the Storm.

6.

Gifts to Reed's Annual Fund are essential to maintain support for which Reed activities?

Financial aid for students who otherwise could not afford tuition

Resources for student and faculty researchers, who might otherwise become obsessed with transmuting lead into gold

Counseling for students, who might otherwise go mad with insomnia and vertiginous dialectic

Maintenance of the canyon, which would otherwise degenerate into a morass of invasive species and bitter, alcoholic ducks

All of the above

Yes, the Annual Fund supports supports all this and more.

Explanation

Yes, the Annual Fund supports supports all this and more.

7. The first Campus Day in 1912 included what rollicking, wholesome amusement?

A jolly penny-farthing-bicycle joust

A gripping round of tug-of-war across the canyon

A bracing spot of handlebar-moustache fencing

A moving “Save the Quagga” rally

A rousing game of pin the tail on the Kaiser

Campus Day was succeeded by Canyon Day, which is still going strong.

Explanation

Campus Day was succeeded by Canyon Day, which is still going strong.

8.

What became 16 times larger during the tenure of Reed president Paul Bragdon [1971–88]?

Minority student representation

Reed’s administrative staff

Reed’s endowment

Bragdon’s endowment

Hulk Hogan

Reed's endowment was $4.4 million when President Bragdon arrived in 1971. It stood at $74 million when he retired in 1988.

Explanation

Reed's endowment was $4.4 million when President Bragdon arrived in 1971. It stood at $74 million when he retired in 1988.

9. The Columbus Day storm that devastated Portland in 1962 has been seen as divine retribution for what Reedie-instituted provocation?

Students begin adding stories to thesis tower, with goal of reaching heaven itself.

President Richard Sullivan leaves town; Reedies construct and worship golden owl in his absence.

Mock crucifixion at football game.

Mock football game at crucifixion.

Students rewrite Old Testament as a slash-and-stalk epic titled Vengeance Is Up for Grabs.

Coach Jack Scrivens tells the tale in The Half-Time Crucifiction from the Winter 2009 edition of Reed.

Explanation

Coach Jack Scrivens tells the tale in The Half-Time Crucifiction from the Winter 2009 edition of Reed.

10. The catalogue of ships is a legendary passage in which book?

Herodotus’ Histories

The Odyssey

The Iliad

Prof. Nite E. Nite’s Lullabies of Somnolence

Shareholders’ Prospectus for the Maersk Corporation

The catalogue of ships is a legendary passage in The Iliad. The Iliad is an ancient Greek epic poem attributed to Homer. It tells the story of the Trojan War and the Greek hero Achilles. The catalogue of ships is a detailed list of the Greek forces that participated in the war, providing information about their leaders, origins, and numbers. This passage serves to emphasize the vastness and diversity of the Greek army, highlighting the importance of the war and the epic nature of the poem.

Explanation

The catalogue of ships is a legendary passage in The Iliad. The Iliad is an ancient Greek epic poem attributed to Homer. It tells the story of the Trojan War and the Greek hero Achilles. The catalogue of ships is a detailed list of the Greek forces that participated in the war, providing information about their leaders, origins, and numbers. This passage serves to emphasize the vastness and diversity of the Greek army, highlighting the importance of the war and the epic nature of the poem.

11. Subsequent to its founding, in what year was Reed's Seventh-Annual Nitrogen Day celebration held?

1919

1951

1998

2004

Every year

Sure, you knew that nitrogen is the 7th element. But did you know that Nitrogen Day is held every year?

Explanation

Sure, you knew that nitrogen is the 7th element. But did you know that Nitrogen Day is held every year?

12. According to legend, the first Doyle Owl came from where?

Sprang fully formed from the brow of Reed president Dexter M. Keezer.

Wrenched in a midnight raid from the roof of Old Dorm Block.

Live pet owl belonging to student makes mistake of staring directly into the eyes of anthropology professor Gail Kelly.

Lawn decoration stolen from Eastmoreland house.

Has always existed; the college—nay, the world—was constructed around it.

The correct answer is "Lawn decoration stolen from Eastmoreland house." This is because the question asks where the first Doyle Owl came from, and this option states that it was stolen from a specific house. The other options are either unrelated or do not provide a clear explanation of the origin of the Doyle Owl.

Explanation

The correct answer is "Lawn decoration stolen from Eastmoreland house." This is because the question asks where the first Doyle Owl came from, and this option states that it was stolen from a specific house. The other options are either unrelated or do not provide a clear explanation of the origin of the Doyle Owl.

13. Reed president Richard F. Scholz is famous for doing what?

Banning fraternities, sororities, and intercollegiate sports at Reed.

Instituting a broad humanities requirement for all students.

Catching cold at his own inauguration and dying a scant 41 days later.

Other than that, Mrs. Scholz, how was the play?

Siring legendary guitarist for the band Boston, Tom Scholz.

See How the Humanities Saved Reed, from Spring 2009 edition of Reed.

Explanation

See How the Humanities Saved Reed, from Spring 2009 edition of Reed.

14. What did former registrar Ellen Knowlton Johnson '39 do to help seniors get their theses in by the noon deadline?

Invented No-Doz

Moved the deadline to noon; it had originally been 8 a.m.

Instituted the highly motivational policy of burning latecomers at the stake

Unplugged the clock in the registrar’s office at 11:59 a.m.

See Tales of the Tower, from the Autumn 2009 edition of Reed.

Explanation

See Tales of the Tower, from the Autumn 2009 edition of Reed.

15.

What is the formal name of the Portland "tall-bike" club founded by Karl Anderson '95?

The Portland Tall Bike Club.

Tribulation 99.

Compound Fracture Society.

Chunk 666.

They have no formal name, sneering at your ersatz concept of bourgeois formality.

See Attack of the Velocipedes, from the December 2012 edition of Reed.

Explanation

See Attack of the Velocipedes, from the December 2012 edition of Reed.

16. According to the simplified spelling system championed by Reed president William T. Foster [1910–19], how should one write the sentence, "As a sophomore, I sailed the islands in a freighter, pitching my hammock in a gallery filled with riff-raff and crumbs"?

“Faw-fa faw-haw-haw, faw-fa-faw-haw, FAW-FA-HAW-FAW, ha-fawwww.”

Another question with no right answer. Ha ha! Welcome to the humanities.

Explanation

Another question with no right answer. Ha ha! Welcome to the humanities.

17. In 1968, students occupied Eliot Hall demanding what?

Divestment from South Africa

A black studies program at Reed

The release of Mumia Abu-Jamal

The head of Alfredo Garcia and a cup of hot fat

A shrubbery

NOTE. There is an error in the print edition of this quiz which lists the wrong answer. The correct answer is indeed "a black studies program at Reed." Check out "A Small Insurrection, A Great Divide" from the November 2003 edition of Reed. Our apologies for the confusion.

Explanation

NOTE. There is an error in the print edition of this quiz which lists the wrong answer. The correct answer is indeed "a black studies program at Reed." Check out "A Small Insurrection, A Great Divide" from the November 2003 edition of Reed. Our apologies for the confusion.

18. What was the original name of the dormitory now known as MacNaughton?

New Women’s Dorm

New Men’s Dorm

Old Men’s Dorm

Little Spandau

The Quarrymen

The "New Women's Dormitory," designed by Belluschi and Skidmore, Owings & Merrill, was completed in 1954 and renamed MacNaughton in 1959.

Explanation

The "New Women's Dormitory," designed by Belluschi and Skidmore, Owings & Merrill, was completed in 1954 and renamed MacNaughton in 1959.

19.

Which of the following is (or was) a name for the Reed College women's rugby team?

The Maulin’ Medeas

Les Griffons D’Or

The Echidnae

The Badass Sparkle Princesses

Lower Middlemarch

Don't mess with them! Reed has produced several great players, including two members of the US National Team.

Explanation

Don't mess with them! Reed has produced several great players, including two members of the US National Team.

20.

What is famously buried under Reed's Erik V. Hauser Memorial Library?

The original Doyle Owl

A British sports car

A time capsule to be opened in the year 2412

Another, smaller library

Jimmy Hoffa

You doubt this? Check out the definitive article, Burying the MG, from the September 2011 edition of Reed.

Explanation

You doubt this? Check out the definitive article, Burying the MG, from the September 2011 edition of Reed.

21. The fuel stockpile for Reed's nuclear reactor comprises what?

6 kg of plutonium repurposed from the Hanford Nuclear Reservation.

3 kg of uranium scrounged from the University of Arizona.

1 kg of thorium on loan from the Department of Energy.

Original birth heart of former U.S. Vice President Richard B. Cheney.

Glowing, telepathic green orb pursued by a sword-wielding alien woman in metal underwear.

Reed scrounged 91 fuel rods from the University of Arizona in 2011.

Explanation

Reed scrounged 91 fuel rods from the University of Arizona in 2011.

22. What benevolent saying is emblazoned on the bottom reverse of the envelope in every issue of Reed magazine?

“Thank you for your support.”

“Your gift makes the difference.”

“History will be kind to Reed, for Reed intends to write it.”

“That education is best which educates least.”

“We can’t stop here; this is bat country.”

You would of course be familiar with this envelope, right? The one you tear off and mail back to us with a check, right? Um... right?

Explanation

You would of course be familiar with this envelope, right? The one you tear off and mail back to us with a check, right? Um... right?

23.

How many Reedies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Reedies don’t screw in light bulbs; they screw in the SU loft.

Five. One to screw it in, four to get the PE credit.

Only one, but it takes six years.

None, just glue it to your thesis and let your universe revolve around it.

This answer is a play on words and a reference to the academic culture at Reed College. Reedies are known for their intense focus on academic work, particularly their senior thesis. The answer suggests that instead of screwing in a light bulb, Reedies would prioritize their thesis and make it the center of their universe.

Explanation

This answer is a play on words and a reference to the academic culture at Reed College. Reedies are known for their intense focus on academic work, particularly their senior thesis. The answer suggests that instead of screwing in a light bulb, Reedies would prioritize their thesis and make it the center of their universe.

24. As of 2014, how many Doyle Owls have there been at Reed?

1

6

Would you count the smiles of a child, or the stars in the sky? (Never mind, you probably would.)

23 plus or minus 11

ℵ1

OK, we'll confess-- no one really knows. But this stupid quiz software won't let us have an "anything goes" answer. Read more about the legendary Doyle Owl in this excerpt from Comrades of the Quest.

Explanation

OK, we'll confess-- no one really knows. But this stupid quiz software won't let us have an "anything goes" answer. Read more about the legendary Doyle Owl in this excerpt from Comrades of the Quest.

25. Until the 1940s, the job now known as dean of students had what title?

Dean of Men

Dean of Women

Dean of Discipline

Master of Reality

Operating Thetan Level IV

Hard to believe, but in the early years of Reed's existence, it was assumed that male students had no need for a Dean.

Explanation

Hard to believe, but in the early years of Reed's existence, it was assumed that male students had no need for a Dean.