North Dakota Null Hypothesis Brain Damage Inventory

75 Questions | Total Attempts: 407

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Hypothesis Quizzes & Trivia

The 80 item NDNI, which resembles the popluar Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory,  was distributed as a typescript in the early 1980s.  Though headlined "all rights reserved", no author or copyright date has been preserved in any copy available.  If anyone complains, this version will be removed.  As originally distributed, there was no answer key.  After extensive research, Dr. Zachary Smith has developed this version which, as the title promises, will almost certainly diagnose some type of mental infirmity if the respondent is stubborn enough to complete the form.  Warning!  Dr. Smith is neither a professional doctor nor a professional comedian, so if you go any further, you're on your own. . .


Questions and Answers
  • 1. 
    I salivate at the sight of mittens.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 2. 
    My father was a good woman.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 3. 
    At times I am very afraid that my toes will fall off.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 4. 
    People who go into the street are apt to be bitten by a horse.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 5. 
    As an infant, I had very few hobbies.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 6. 
    I hate chopped liver.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 7. 
    Sometimes I think God is a Fink.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 8. 
    I prefer spiders to lima beans.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 9. 
    Some people never look at me.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 10. 
    I believe in afterbirth.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 11. 
    I somtimes believe that my earlobes are longer than those of other people.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 12. 
    I often use the word "feh".
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 13. 
    I never dream about real things.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 14. 
    God is love.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 15. 
    Spinach makes me feel alone.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 16. 
    My sex life is A-OK.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 17. 
    Sometimes I steal objects like medicine balls and avairys.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 18. 
    I am frequently afraid to cross the street.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 19. 
    When I look down from a high place I want to spit.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 20. 
    I am anxious in rooms that have hairy walls.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 21. 
    Dirty stories make me think about sex.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 22. 
    I read the editorials in the J. Clinical Hypnosis every month.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 23. 
    I like to kill mosquitoes.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 24. 
    Burning buildings make me snigger.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 25. 
    Cousins are not to be trusted.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 26. 
    Most people are not as old as they think they are.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 27. 
    Sometimes I think someone is trying to take over my stomach.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 28. 
    I get nauseous from too much skating.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 29. 
    I think most people would cry to gain a point.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 30. 
    Often, I think I am a special agent of Billy Graham.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 31. 
    I cannot read or write.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 32. 
    I am bored by thoughts of death.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 33. 
    I become homicidal when people try to reason with me.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 34. 
    I do most of my reading on the toilet.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 35. 
    I rarely think before I eat.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 36. 
    I got my job through the New York Times.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 37. 
    I often lie to make myself obnoxious.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 38. 
    I am never startled by a fish.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 39. 
    My teeth sometimes leave my body.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 40. 
    Nothing is happening, just as Schopenhauer predicted.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 41. 
    I don't like it when somebody is rotten.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 42. 
    People who break the law are wise guys.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 43. 
    Plaid Stamps are better than Green Stamps.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 44. 
    I have never gone to pieces over the weekend.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 45. 
    My parents faced catastrophe with a song.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 46. 
    Recently, I have been getting shorter.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 47. 
    I would enjoy the work of a herpetologist.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 48. 
    Sometimes I find it hard to conceal the fact that I'm not angry.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 49. 
    Policemen love me.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 50. 
    I have taken shoe polish to excess.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 51. 
    I have always been disturbed by the size of Lincoln's ears.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 52. 
    I like mannish children.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 53. 
    I seldom use greasy kids stuff.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 54. 
    I always let people get ahead of me at swimming pools.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 55. 
    I wish I were as sick as a great genius.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 56. 
    It makes me angry to have people bury me.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 57. 
    I am not afraid of picking up doorknobs.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 58. 
    Chiclets make me sweat.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 59. 
    I believe that I smell as good as most people.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 60. 
    I am afraid of finding myself in a drawer or some other compromising place.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 61. 
    Parts of my body crawl away.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 62. 
    I stay in the bathtub until I look like a raisin.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 63. 
    Frantic screams make me nervous.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 64. 
    Most people vomit out of spite.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 65. 
    I hate orgies.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 66. 
    Constantly losing my underwear doesn't bother me.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 67. 
    My name is spelled with two S's.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 68. 
    It is hard for me to find the right thing to say when I find myself in a room full of cockroaches.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 69. 
    Halitosis is part of my style.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 70. 
    I have an uncontrollable urge to fondle other people's teeth.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 71. 
    I would never tell my nickname in a crisis.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 72. 
    A wide necktie is a sign of disease.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide

  • 73. 
    As a child I was deprived of licorice.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 74. 
    I would never shake hands with a gardener.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide.

  • 75. 
    My eyes are always cold.
    • A. 

      Absolutely !

    • B. 

      Maybe a bit. So what?

    • C. 

      No way.

    • D. 

      Can't decide. Let me sleep on it.