Which Nazi Pastime Are You?

5 Questions | Total Attempts: 293

Which Nazi Pastime Are You? - Quiz

Goosestepping? Book burning? Ruining the Olymipics? Which Nazi pastime are you? Take the quiz and find out!


You May Get

Book Burning!

You love the warm embrace setting a nice bit of literature alight. You delight those around you and create a sense of togetherness. Power through Unity! Unity through burning "Tanterbury Bales".

Goose Stepping!

With your long feet-sticks, you love to schlep around the place, exciting your own people and scaring the natives. You are an extrovert at heart, yet no matter how much attention your receive, it's never enough.

Looking After Hitler!

Man, you can't get enough of that Adolf H. He's one cool cat. Whether it's protecting him from exploding briefcases, finding his teddy, or giving one to Eva Braun when he can't be bothered - he's number one on your priority list!

Rigging the Olympics!

Whoa-ho-ho! We can't have none of those black fellows showing us up! It's up to you to put tacks in their running shoes, laxatives in their half time oranges and fitting the German contestents with rocket-boots. The Fatherland must win at all costs!

Dabbling in The Occult!

Wowsers!  You are a weird one. You LOVE to look high and low for that darned Spear of Destiny; you ADORE building biomechanical Super Soldats for Herr Hitler; you REALLY ENJOY partaking in eldritch rituals off the coast of Iceland. Without you, we wouldn't have things like "Hellboy" and "Indiana Jones", you silly bastard.
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Questions and Answers
  • 1. 
    Which Toy Story character do you relate to the most?
    • A. 

      Sid, the awful child from next door.

    • B. 

      Sid, the awful child from next door.

  • 2. 
    If you were locked out of your Panzer Tank, what would you do?
    • A. 

      Have a little cry.

    • B. 

      Mindlessly goosestep around until someone comes to help.

    • C. 

      Do a shit on it.

    • D. 

      Set fire to it.

    • E. 

      Summon an eldritch spirit to open it for you.

  • 3. 
    The Hitlers are coming over for dinner and (oh no!), you just realized you've cooked schweinerblitzen for your guests, forgetting that they're vegetarians! What do you do?
    • A. 

      Eat it all yourself, like a fucking greedy Kraut pig.

    • B. 

      Go out and buy a cabbage.

    • C. 

      Turn it into a stack of beets with magic.

    • D. 

      Stamp your little German foot and swear magnificently.

    • E. 

      Put it to the back of your mind as you realize you've just burned the applenschlockenspirrenzaat (dessert).

  • 4. 
    Oh noes! The Allies are landing at Normandy! What do you do?
    • A. 

      Adopt every aspect of Hitler so that you can die and he can slip away to Argentina.

    • B. 

      Do a shit on them.

    • C. 

      March right down to that beach and kick das sandenschplitzen in their faces.

    • D. 

      Pretend to be Fiji.

    • E. 

      Turn yourself into Fiji with magic.

  • 5. 
    It's Hiter's birthday - what are you getting him?
    • A. 

      The still-beating heart of Winston Churchill.

    • B. 

      A new pair of jack boots.

    • C. 

      A new identity and a one-way zeppelin ticket to Gwam.

    • D. 

      The book of "How to Speak French", translated into French.

    • E. 

      Someone to do a shit on.

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