It's the 25th Year of David's birth and to honor the occasion I have devised a quiz to commemorate his life so far. Some questions have been cleared by Dave and the answers deemed correct. Others I have made up for comedy value.
3
5
7
9
11
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Fighting with Matt Briddon
Falling asleep on a bean bag
Listening atentively
Eating Paul Mellors food
Removing his trousers
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Richard
Christopher
W.C. Grace
Nicky Bowler
Kyla Furness
Zoe Lingard
Emma Jowsey
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Richard Donaher
Nick Keane
Tom 'Rhodsey' Rhodes
Matt Statham
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Norwich
Bolton
Nottingham Forest
Swindon Town
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Liz Chamerberlain
Emma Jowsey
Zoe Lingard
Brett Morris
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SJ
JS
NT
ML
No Teacher
New Teacher
Nicola Turnbull
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Head
Fat Fingers
David Fartley
The Turtle Blimp
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Crabs
Rye Neck
Nits
Rickets
Polio
Her pencil case
Her vibrator
Her hamster
Her tampons
Salad Cream
Tomato Ketchup
Mayonnaise
English Mustard
Reggae Reggae Sauce
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Chicken Dinners
Toad in the Hole
Paella
French Toast
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Pork Scratchings
Any flavour of McCoys
Dry Roasted Peanuts
Ham and Mustard Brannigans
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Lager
Lager Top
Guiness
Black Sheep
Lager, sometimes Cider
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Microwave
Toaster
Kettle
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A Snoopy Electric Can Opener
Soda Stream
Sporks
Turkey Baster
Mr Frosty Ice Cruncher
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Chinese
Pub Lunch
Korean
Indian
Italian
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No he's usually very generous
What's the difference between Dave and a coconut? You can get a drink out of coconut.
Pretty hard but it occasionally happens
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Robin Smith
Nick Knight
Merv Hughes
Phil Defreitas
Devon Malcom
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Gunn and Moore
Gray Nicholls
Hunts County
Sobers
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Military Medium
Wobbly Outswing
Skiddy
Poor
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45
20
14
35
Missionary
Opening
4
6
On the sofa with some happy tissues
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Mick ' The Munch' Skinner
Dewi Morris
Rob Andrew
Jonathon Webb
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1
2
3
4
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Derby
Paviors
Newark
Nottingham
Rotherham
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Never
Lots
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Big Ben
LB
Loughborough
Double D
He stayed and had drinks with his team mates
Home for a well earned nap
Pub Lunch
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Let's knock them for 7
If we beat these guys it'll feel golden and I want to feel gold
Both of them equally
Dave does not enjoy any of carney's pep talks
His kit
A condom
Nothing. Someone had emptied it
A human shit
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Dancing
Kareoke
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Leaves early
Gets naked
Tries to French kiss one of his friends
All of the above
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The Bandstand
Crown Square
Matlock Bridge
Outside Hambridges
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Dancing
Propping up the bar
In the corner alone
All 3
B and/or C
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Dave shit himself
Dave cago si mismo
Dave hat sic angershessen
He broke his leg
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He was drunk
He just needed to go
He was scared
He had seen his reflection and consequently shat himself
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Sir Shitsalot
Winnie the Pooh
Count Turdula
Brown Nose
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Smurf
Ben Redshaw and Andy Carr
Graham Johnson
James Butler
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Richard Carnell
Mike Williamson
Matt Briddon
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Yes
No
He broke his leg
He smashed his teeth
He was hit by a car
He woke up in a hookers bed
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He fell over on the curb with his hands in his pockets
Matt punched him in the face
A burley stranger punched him in the face
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He got into a fight
He did it played street rugby
He tripped up on the way into the Mindoa bed and breakfast
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Yes
No
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