Don't like them
Instantly love them
Judge them by their handshake
Well, they're not me so who cares?
Who's that dude?
Food....mostly cheese....and cake...mmmm
Television and everyone
Beautiful, amazing, perfect
Unpredictable and hilarious
Simple farm boy
The complete package
Trying to have it all
I just do whatever Oprah tells me
Like every week like it's Shark Week
Stealing is wrong
The adult dating world is like your haircut; sometimes, awkward triangles occur
I love you, Me
Married to myself
Married but I like to pretend I'm cheating on my wife
Oh, I'm just dating my wife's mother..no biggie!
I'm an angel or something
Working on my night cheese....
My muffin top is all that!
Imagine Christmas wishes shooting out of your eyes
I think you're very special, to be able to get so much joy from simple things...
He's leaving on that midnight train to Georgia....I missed it!
What the what?
Good God Lemon
I don't drink hot liquids of any kind...that's the Devil's temperature
When I go to sleep, nothing happens in the world
I used to want to be an actor but my friend told me I wasn't blonde... :( I guess I'll just marry Astronaut Mike Dexter
Too rich to work
Working for NBC
CEO of GE
Paintings of horses
BLUE MAN WHERE YO FEET AT?
Healthcare for my pigs
Weird expensive products no one has ever heard of