The Definitely Serious Star Trek Quiz
Which character are you? The classic Enterprise crew ran the gamut from very heroic, to quite heroic, to even only moderately heroic. This quiz is sure to delve deep into your soul and present you with the brutal truth.
- 1.
Before you take this quiz, agree to the terms and conditions of your five-year mission:1. It is mandatory to seek out new life and civilizations. Should the opportunity arise, youwill also boldly go where no man has gone before. Women and Romulans may already bethere, however.2. If the ship's sensors say the planet is uninhabited, the planet is inhabited.3. If Starfleet said there would be people, they are dead now.4. Any member of the landing party who goes for a walk on his own deserves whathappens.5. The functionality of your communicator will be inversely proportional to your safety.6. It will take more tries to beam you aboard the closer you are to dying this very instant.7. Starfleet is a diverse melting pot of cultural stereotypes. You will respect yourcomrades whether they are Southern, Scottish, Asian, African, or pointy-eared.
- A.
I agree
- B.
I'm not so sure
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- 2.
What makes you uncomfortable?
- A.
Meeting your heroes
- B.
Betraying your leader
- C.
Being controlled
- D.
Breaking the rules
- E.
Following your friend's lead
- F.
Mistreating technology
- G.
Babies
- H.
Boop
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- 3.
Why aren't you fighting?
- A.
Because I would lose
- B.
Because I would win
- C.
Because I'm a doctor, not a pugilist
- D.
Who said I'm not fighting?
- E.
Because it's not sporting
- F.
Because I'm obliged to try diplomacy first
- G.
Because my skirt is too short to kick high
- H.
Boop
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- 4.
When you're attracted to someone, you . . .
- A.
Kiss them
- B.
Marry them
- C.
Tease them
- D.
Act suave and reassuring
- E.
Get totally flustered
- F.
Become very polite
- G.
Defend their honor
- H.
Boop
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- 5.
Favorite animal?
- A.
Cats
- B.
Sheep
- C.
Bears
- D.
Tribbles
- E.
Kiddos
- F.
Babies
- G.
I prefer plants
- H.
Boop
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- 6.
What makes you mad as hell?
- A.
Just about anything
- B.
Insults to your leader
- C.
Threats against your people
- D.
Not much whatsoever
- E.
Being called a freak
- F.
Orders to betray your values
- G.
Klingons
- H.
Boop
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- 7.
Drink of choice?
- A.
Scotch
- B.
Pomegranate juice
- C.
Romulan ale
- D.
Mint julep
- E.
Vodka
- F.
Sake
- G.
Coffee
- H.
Boop
-
- 8.
You fight like . . .
- A.
A fencer
- B.
A wrestler
- C.
A pub brawler
- D.
A pacifist ninja
- E.
A startled secretary
- F.
A teenage dweeb
- G.
A middle-aged man
- H.
Boop
-
- 9.
Course of study?
- A.
Xenolinguistics
- B.
Navigation and physics
- C.
Navigation and botany
- D.
Math, physics, art, music and programming
- E.
Medicine and psychology
- F.
Strategy and diplomacy
- G.
Engineering
- H.
Boop
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- 10.
What are you scared of?
- A.
Engine failure
- B.
Having your atoms scattered across the universe
- C.
Looking like a n00b
- D.
Samurai
- E.
Getting everyone killed
- F.
Showing emotion
- G.
Mortality
- H.
Boop
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- 11.
Something is seriously wrong when you . . .
- A.
Shout down a subordinate
- B.
Give up the brandy you were saving
- C.
Smile
- D.
Say you're frightened
- E.
Start a sword fight
- F.
Wish your friend luck
- G.
Attack a lady
- H.
Boop
-
- 12.
What turns you on?
- A.
Priestesses
- B.
Wit and wisdom; also, Romulans
- C.
Possessed chicks
- D.
Hippies
- E.
Tortured souls
- F.
Communications specialists
- G.
Yeomen, androids, empaths, Indians, slaves, prosecutors, superfast aliens, drill thralls, overpopulated aliens, witches, dancers, back massages, whale biologists, 1930s women and most female members of most landing parties
- H.
Boop
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