Chapter Interpersonal Attraction From First Impressions To Close Relatonships

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One of the simplest determinants of interpersonal attraction is proximity propinquity
the finding that the more we see and interact with people, the more likely they are to become our friends and lovers. propinquity effect
Attraction and propinquity rely on - Actual physical distance
- Functional distance

certain aspects of architectural design that make it likely some people will come into contact with each other more often than others (e.g. location of rest room, stairs, elevator, or mailboxes). Functional distance
The propinquity effect works because of familiarity-the finding that the more exposure we have to a stimulus, the more apt we are to like it. mere exposure effect
We can be attracted to people who are: - like us or opposite to us
like us
(similarity)
Opposite to us (complementarity)
what is a stronger predictor of attraction?
Similarity
Liking someone who likes us in return.
One of the prime determinants of interpersonal attraction.
Reciprocal liking effects only occur if you like yourself in the first place.
Reciprocal liking
Another major determinant of liking.
More emphasized by men than by women, especially when choosing a long-term mate.
Physical attractiveness
Both sexes prefer...
larger eyes (baby face feature), prominent cheekbones, and a big smile.
what do males prefer?
a female face with a small nose, small chin, and high eyebrows.
what do females prefer?
large chin
the process whereby people make mistaken inferences about what is causing them to feel the way they do. Misattribution of Arousal
he feelings of intimacy and affection we feel for another person when we care deeply. Companionate love:
the feeling of intense longing, accompanied by physiological arousal, we feel for another person; when our love is reciprocated, we feel great fulfillment and ecstasy, but when it is not, we feel sadness and despair.
Passionate love
is derived from evolutionary biology.
states that men and women are attracted to each other’s characteristics, which maximizes reproductive success.
Evolutionary approach
men are attracted to a woman’s _____
women are attracted by men’s _____
appearance
resources
Attachment theory
suggests that our behaviour in adult relationships is based on our experiences as infants with our parents or caregivers.
the expectations people develop about relationships with others, based on the relationship they had with their primary caregiver when they were infants. Attachment styles
characterized by:
Trust.
A lack of concern with being abandoned.
The view that one is worthy and well liked.
Secure attachment style
Is characterized by a concern that others will not reciprocate one’s desire for intimacy. Anxious/ambivalent attachment style
Resulting in higher-than-average levels of anxiety.
Is characterized by a suppression of attachment needs because attempts to be intimate have been rebuffed. avoidant attachment styles
Two types of avoidant attachment are: - Fearful avoidant attachment style
- Dismissive avoidant style
avoids close relationships because of mistrust and fears of being hurt. Fearful avoidant attachment style
in which the person:
claims to be self-sufficient.
claims not to need close relationships.
Dismissive avoidant style
suggests that how people feel about their relationships depends on: Their perception of the rewards and costs of the relationship (reward/cost ratio).
The kind of relationship they deserve (comparison level).
Their chances of having a better relationship with someone else (comparison level for alternatives)
social exchange theory
in social exchange theory is the notion that there is a balance between:
The rewards that come from a relationship
and the personal cost of maintaining the
relationship.
Reward/cost ratio
people’s expectations about the level of rewards and punishments they deserve in a relationship. Comparison levels
people’s expectations about the level of rewards and punishments they would receive in an alternative relationship. Comparison level for alternatives
people’s commitment to a relationship depends on:
Their satisfaction with the relationship in terms of rewards, costs, and comparison level for alternatives.
How much they have invested in the relationship that would be lost by leaving it.
investment model
suggests that people are happiest with relationships in which the rewards and costs that a person experiences and the contributions that she/he makes to the relationship are roughly equal to the rewards, costs, and contributions of the other person. equity theory
in which people are concerned about a fair distribution of rewards and costs. Exchange relationships
Short term relationships are usually: Exchange relationships
Long term, intimate relationships are usually: Communal relationships
people are less concerned with an immediate accounting of who is contributing what and are more concerned with helping their partner when she/he is in need. Communal relationships
that the outcome of adversity on a relationship depends on the level of commitment. commitment calibration hypothesis
If the level of adversity is:
Lower than the level of commitment
the relationship is not challenged.
If the level of adversity is:Higher than the level of commitment
the relationship ends.
If the level of adversity is: Equal to the level of commitment, the relationship is strengthened. the relationship is strengthened.
idealizations of our romantic relationships and partners in order to maintain the relationship. Positive illusions
The more we idealize our partner - The greater our satisfaction with a relationship.
- The more likely our relationship will endure.
Relationships can break up due to: Becoming dissimilar.
Existence of low rewards and high costs.
Inequity in relationship.
Boredom.
Baxter (1982) identified four strategies for dissolution of a relationship: Withdrawal/avoidance.
Positive tone (e.g. trying to prevent hard feelings).
Manipulative strategies (e.g. getting a third party to communicate the bad news).
Open confrontation.
Those who play an active role suffer ____
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