What Type Of Couple Are You?

10 Questions | By Chadp1018568 | Updated: Jan 9, 2023 | Attempts: 1937

Find out what type of couple you and your present / future partner are. There's no denying the truth, so stop procrastinating and do something drastic to boost your quality of life.

You May Get

The Childhood Sweethearts

You are the classic archetype of the 'Childhood Sweethearts'. You met at secondary school or college at age 16. You're each other's first sexual partner and proper girlfriend and boyfriend. You class yourselves as true soul mates, and refer to each other as 'the one'. You met in a random situation, such as introduction through friends, at an arcade with friends, drinking underage in a pub with friends, bowling with friends or sat on the swings drinking cider with your respective groups of friends, and because there were no other potential partners available, you decided to tag along together. You see each other every day and you refuse to spend time with your real friends. You experiment with various sexual fantasies because neither of you can fulfil each other's sexual desires, however you can't bear the thought of trying to experiment with a new partner. All you have is each other and you're afraid of being alone, therefore you stay together even though there is no love or respect. You refuse to attend university and you settle for poor grades upon completing education because all you want to do is buy a house and start up your own family. You spend too much money on each other, whether it be on holiday or birthday and Christmas presents. Your conversation material to work colleagues or family or your remaining childhood friends or in private between the pair of you involves cute nickname words you created for each other, obsessions with bodily areas and/or functions, and arguments over what to do once you both get up out of bed in the afternoon. You'll probably never leave home or the surrounding region or get a proper career. This relationship duration is on average between 1 to 4 years, and normally carries on 3 years too long. Break up, bone other people, make new friends and travel the world while you still can.

The Unlikely Match

You are the classic archetype of the 'Unlikely Match'. Horoscope-wise, the match was never perfect, and you probably met in a heated debate or queuing in a supermarket. But more than likely, you met in a nightclub and were drawn together because either a) there were no attractive people to fuck, b) nobody else was interested in you or if you're a male, c) the nightclub was a 'cockfest' with a male-female ratio of 80:20, all the girls' soldier boyfriends were there to keep a close eye on them and the fat bird at the bar was all that was going. You're an unlikely match because you were thrown together and you're together because you both hate being alone and would rather settle for 'what's left over' rather than searching deeper elsewhere. One of you is normally short, morbidly obese and has joint problems, the other is abnormally tall and skinny. You both live on evenings in watching DVD's, eating popcorn and getting fatter. You both hate going out because you have nothing to talk about and you know that there might be someone else worth engaging in conversation with, probably more desirable too. This relationship normally lasts between 6 months to 2 years and ends in pregnancy.

& many more results.
Start this quiz to find your result.

Questions and Answers

1.

The way you choose your perfect partner is based on...
- A.
  
  We met randomly through friends
- B.
  
  Whatever's available at the time
- C.
  
  The type of car they drive and how well they can father someone elses kids
- D.
  
  How good they are in bed
2.

You're in a nightclub. A potential partner offers you a drink. You...
- A.
  
  Tell them you're already with someone and ignore them, causing upset
- B.
  
  Look at how big they are, but decide to put obstacles aside in this case
- C.
  
  Agree and steal the contents of their wallet while they pay for the drink
- D.
  
  Offer them a condom and somewhere to sleep
3.

What is your partner's best feature?
- A.
  
  Don't know, we've known each other so long
- B.
  
  Her five stomachs
- C.
  
  Their car and their inability to ask why your kids are black
- D.
  
  My cock inside her ass
4.

What do you look for most in a relationship?
- A.
  
  Loves and cuddly wuddles and belly farts and buttock crack licking, it tickles her and makes her laugh
- B.
  
  The remote control
- C.
  
  The welfare state. Because it is well-fair
- D.
  
  A safe way out if she gets pregnant
5.

Where would you both like to get married?
- A.
  
  On a beach in Hawaii, once we've both done the same fitness plan, got matching clothes and tans
- B.
  
  At home, but she needs a dress that fits her first, and I need to borrow me dad's suit
- C.
  
  Outside these prison walls
- D.
  
  Marriage? Fuck that!
6.

How many children do you want?
- A.
  
  I want a boy and a girl. He wants two boys. But that's always him...
- B.
  
  We're just together for the fun of it, but a kid wouldn't hurt. Well, it would hurt her, but she's big enough to deal with it
- C.
  
  Twelve. So we can have our own football team! Eh, togger?
- D.
  
  None. Never. Oh, no.
7.

How attractive is your partner?
- A.
  
  So much! Let me count the ways, oh,
- B.
  
  I don't fancy her, and she doesn't fancy me. But we're together, that's what matters
- C.
  
  He's got an ugly mug, but he's handsome to me
- D.
  
  That doesn't matter. It's the sex that counts
8.

What's your ideal Christmas present?
- A.
  
  Well, a ring, or a pair of straighteners, or earrings, or any jewellery, or a digital camera, anything that's too expensive but he should splash out on me because I'm his one true love
- B.
  
  A way to have sex because missionary is impossible
- C.
  
  Another pregnancy test, Togger's parole and a ticket to the Bahamas
- D.
  
  Santa in Dominatrix gear
9.

How did you meet?
- A.
  
  At school. We've always been together
- B.
  
  In a nightclub. We were the leftovers
- C.
  
  We're cousins, but that doesn't stop us
- D.
  
  Office party
10.

What's your ideal chat up line if you met each other in a club?
- A.
  
  Are you alright love, because I just saw you fall from heaven.
- B.
  
  Fancy a Chinese and a Twix?
- C.
  
  Are you good with kids? Want another one? Let's earn some money...
- D.
  
  Fancy a fuck?