A waste of space
A necessary evil
On a cushy number
Essential viewing at the TV conference hotel - there might be some new ideas you can 'adopt'.
A source of envy - why don't your shows have those viewing figures / production values?
Trash. You only produce socially responsible works of art.
Perfect for 'tweaking' for the domestic market. No one will notice. Hopefully.
Have only got where they are by sleeping with the right people. And some of the wrong ones too.
Are put upon and surrounded by fools.
Are nothing but funding sex objects.
Are clueless idiots who wouldn't know a good idea if someone presented it to them.
Is of no consequence. I only make films that might impress industry award panels.
Is fickle and unpredictable.
Gets in the way when I'm trying to film landscape shots.
Don't know what's good for them.
Come to me in a flash of inspiration. Often in the bedrooms of foreign hotels.
All look the same these days. Where are all the big, noisy, fresh new ones?
Get stolen. NEVER tell anyone your idea.
Come from other people.
Is best left to other people. I'm too busy.
Is a political minefield. And I'm usually the main casualty.
Is an anathema. I make films.
Is like giving birth to a football.
Are best when scrawled on the back of an envelope - anything more is a waste of my precious time.
Make me lose the will to live.
Are pointless - an artistic vision cannot be constrained on a piece of paper.
Are an ideal opportunity for me to show how erudite I am.
Best done in the conference bar at midnight.
Usually all style and no substance.
An area where sweaty sporting activities are performed.
An opportunity to bullsh*t, er, be verbally creative.
Can't be that hard, I just don't have time at the moment.
Is a rare skill.
Is not my job.
Is a pain in the ass.
Always put a spanner in the works.
Mean I can get more bang for their buck.
Mean I have to make irrelevant and tedious versions of my film, when I should be moving on to my next, potentially award-winning film.
Should be courted and seduced - that's why everyone goes to Cannes.