.
Eliminating language referring to “the ninety-nine per cent.”
Eliminating language concerning female reproductive rights.
Restoring language that recognizes Jerusalem as the capital of Israel.
Adding language that acknowledges reservations about nationalized health care.
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He had shaved more than an hour off of his best marathon time.
He had run through Pamplona thirty days, not thirty seconds, prior to the release of the bulls.
He had added more than a hundred pounds to his best bench press.
He had added three hours to his longest recorded filibuster.
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China.
Sweden.
India.
New Zealand.
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Professional wrestling.
Showing cats.
Lap dances.
Laser Floyd.
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Gold.
Ivory.
Wheat.
Rare earth elements.
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Taking daily multivitamins.
Jogging.
Hot yoga.
Eating organic foods.
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Google, which can no longer call a version of its Android operating system Gingerbread.
Caballero Video, a producer of pornographic films, which must temporarily restrain from selling its “Ben & Cherry’s” series.
Viacom, which must stop Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert from using the ice-cream brand on their shows.
A political consulting firm in Rhode Island, which can no longer use spoofed flavors to attack its clients’ opponents.
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Tim Tebow.
Eli Manning.
Peyton Manning.
Drew Brees.
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Venus and Serena Williams.
Leander Paes and Radek Stepanek.
Bob and Mike Bryan.
Kveta Peschke and Marcin Matkowski.
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Two hundred thousand.
Fifty thousand.
Ninety-six thousand.
Eighty-seven thousand.
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Egypt.
Brazil.
France.
Israel.
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“Super Sad True Love Story.”
“Cloud Atlas.”
“The Hunger Games.”
“Atlas Shrugged.”
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