Type /nm and ignore him, if he doesn't know about Ctrl + ~ that's his own fault.
PM him and offer to show him the way. When you get there, you also tank some Poporings for him, so he gets those job levels he needs to job change.
You offer to bring your HP around, so that you can warp him there. The novice is delighted he found someone so helpful! So you warp him to the Harpy map, and /gg as soon as he walks into the portal.
To buy them both and resell for 90,000,000 each. Woot, now that's some good profit! What jackass that guy was for setting the price incorrectly! That'll teach them! /heh
To buy one of them so you can finally make that Immune Manteau. You think about getting the second card too, but you're a little low on zeny, and that was a good bargain anyway.
To buy both cards, and mail the seller about their mistake. You write that you'll gladly send the cards back for the total you paid for, and that you're interested in buying one of the cards at a fair price.
You bask in your accomplisment! You finally got that GTB card!! Congrats! Look at that noob on the floor, what's he typing... nevermind, you don't even pay attention to what he's saying. You tele back to Al de Baran to tell everyone about your new card.
Trade the fallen player's corpse. You give the card back to them and congratulate them. Then you use a Yggdrasil leaf on them and offer to tele them back to town.
Tell them you are sorry, but you are taking the card. After all, you've been camping the MVP for days, and since you were able to pick up the card, it's rightfully yours. Too bad, but bring more pots next time.
You PM her and cuss the hell out of her, for making you lose 1% XP. You argue back and forth for a while, and you finally switch chars and go level something else. You're discouraged and won't play that char for a few months.
Switch chars and grab 50 Bloody Branches to populate the map. That'll show her. What's the b*tch doing with a LK at HO's anyway? But she was kind of cute with that pink hair style... you plan on ROPDing her char later, and start stalking her all over the game.
You happened to get a screenshot of the Lord Knight train mobbing, so you PM her to ask if she could be more careful next time. She LOLs back at you, and keeps mob training, so you decide to send the ill-mannered behavior report to the GMs.
Obviously, you are going to buy them to re-sell! You can't bot at the moment, since your mom is using the internet a lot lately, and your connection is pretty crappy -- she's a jerk, and doesn't want to get broadband, yeah, I know, right?! -- so this is a good opportunity to profit!
You take a screenshot and report the player for suspicion of botting. You could use some cheap Dokebi horns, but you refuse to profit from bots, since they ruin the game, at the end of the day. You see another shop that looks legit, and buy the horns from them.
You'll just buy the Dokebi horns, it's a good deal and your low level chars could really use them to get a few levels. If you don't buy them, someone else will, right?